Ask the Gecko
by Alac, featuring Pae
From the earliest stages of zine-planning, we here at AE thought it would be a great idea to have an "Ask the Gecko" column. After all, you and the Gecko have come to know each other very, very well. What other animal have you seen the insides of? (Not including the DF whale.) And no one else on staff loves to chomp quite so much as Pae Gekkonidae. So here, for your edification and entertainment, we present: "Ask the Gecko"
Questions come from interested (and brave) players who were on IRC when Pae happened to be in the mood to answer them. Or rather, when she was willing to let me pass them on to her once she was done doing chompful and poke-retardant activities.
- Alac
<Nix> oh, I got one! What's a gecko?
A gecko is one that chomps Nix.
<Aero> Have you ever dated the Geico Gecko?
The Geico Gecko was nuked long ago by my associates, so no.
<Kamui> How many souls have you chomped to date?
There are too many to fathom keeping a tally.
<Ricobabie> What other hobbies do you do besides chomping? XD
My other hobbies include terrorizing staff, AKs, forumites, etc. and planning secret plots that you aren't authorized to know about.
<Cubal> Would a Gecko by any other name, still chomp stuff?
A gecko by any other name could chomp, but none are as powerful :3
<Nix> If you could be any other animal, what animal would you be?
I'd be an alac. :D
<Rayf> "Have you ever been full (ie, not-hungry)?"
Alas, being full is something that I've never known :(
<Lanerith> How does she put up with being poked all the time?
I put up with being poked by knowing that those who do have a very interesting future ahead of them :D
<Aero> What would you do if you had to go back in time in order to shapeshift into a semi-human form so that you could escape from a drakel lab?
It's not worth going back in time D:
<Cubal> Anything in particular a gecko won't eat?
Yes, there are some who are of too low of a quality to chomp.
<Frictor> What does she do when she's not working for AQ?
When I'm not doing work with AQ, I chomp and plot, along with some DF and MQ stuffs.
<Rayf> "Have you ever chomped a super-massive black hole, like the ones that form the gravitational centers of galaxies?"
Black holes taste like chicken :D
<birdy> "You like flies ?"
Flies are hardly worth chomping; they're too small.
<Lanerith> Does she still have problems with drakel?
The Drakel phear, so no.
<Rimblade> "What, in your professional opinion, is the difference between a bite and a chomp? What seperates the true artists from the crass amateurs in the field of sudden digestion?"
A bite is what most weaklings do to eat, psh. A chomp gets rid of everything all at once. There is only one true artist in sudden digestion. Rawr.
<birdy> "Do people taste good?"
People also taste like chicken. People in armor taste even better. Nice crunch.
<Frictor> How is it you can flick an electron out of its orbit and send it flying into whatever target you choose?
Mind bullets.
<Ricobabie> If geckos went to shop what would they buy ?
Shops are for chomping, not shopping.
<Wallo> When did you first discover your chomping powers?
Go read, slacker. :D
<Wallo> Where do things go after you've chomped them?
The bottomless pit that is my stomach.
<Rimblade> Oh no... please.... what must I do to convince you to stop chomping me now?! Please, not aga-
Nothing. Chompings are inevitable for ones such as you.
<Kamui> Do you have any geckolings?
I'd be more likely to chomp the geckolings, so no.
<Cubal> Could you get radioactive and... like chomp someone and turn them into the amazing Geckoman or something? OmG!
If there were people who were worthy of being geckomen, yes, but there aren't.
<Nix> What is your favorite element?
Gecko.
<Rimblade> What is it that you look for in a potential victem? Is it simply situation and motive, or is it something more.... diabolical?
That is classified information. You would go blind before reading all of it.
<Rayf> Do you take taste your chomping victims at all, or is there no time for that? If so, who would you says tastes the best?
Things do have a taste, but I don't have a favorite. I hear that Rayfish sticks have a unique flavor, though.
<Rimblade> Why do you hate us all with the fires of a thousand supernovas?! >:-O
Never. I chomp out of <3, sometimes. Though Rimblades baked in the fires of a thousand supernovas sounds quite tasty...
<Xyphos_Celestin> What's the geckos favourite food?
A) Xyxy's B) Cyrus's C) Everything
C :D